In our intimate and lovely chat, actress Alba Bellugi has given a heartfelt glimpse into her journey as Gina in the movie “Maldoror”, a character navigating the painful realities of love, isolation, and personal struggle. Alba had to explore emotional depths during the preparation for this role, in a project that not only challenged her as an actress but also left a lasting impact on her views about trust and justice.
Here she opens up about the intense personification process, working with non-professional actors, and how playing pivotal moments like marriage and motherhood resonated with her on a personal level.
Between the fears and vulnerabilities she has to face everyday, both in her career and in life, and the closest bond with her sister keeps to keep her grounded in moments of doubt.
What’s your first cinema memory?
My mother is Danish, so we grew up watching Danish cartoons and they’re quite strange, so my first cinema memory it’s probably one of those!
Speaking of “Maldoror”, your character, Gina, is a young woman who feels increasingly isolated and neglected by her husband, whose job often takes priority over their relationship. How did you work on the complexity of your character’s feelings and situation?
It was interesting because I saw my character’s journey as this terrible love story where when you love someone so much and you see them going down this death path and death spiral, it comes to a breaking point where the question is: “Do I burn with him or do I save what’s left to save?”. It’s terrible and heartbreaking to see someone you love crumble.
“It’s terrible and heartbreaking to see someone you love crumble.”
What was your preparation process like? How did you manage to “become her”?
We did a lot of preparation before filming, we went on location and met with the people who were playing Gina’s family members, who were actually people who lived there, they weren’t professional actors. So, they really became a family for me.
Also, it’s all set in the ‘90s, so I worked on understanding and interiorizing that historical moment.
Then, Gina gets pregnant at a very delicate moment in the story. Did playing this character affect you or change you in some way?
It was strange because it was the first time that I played so many key moments in a film: I get married, I get pregnant, I give birth. It was intense because in these cases you have to dig into what you have and what you’ve been through. I was trying to ask women on set who were mothers about their pregnancy experience and how it was to give birth, and how the pain felt, but actually no one could remember it!
They say giving birth is so traumatizing that you’re mind erases the memory.
Anyway, “Maldoror” is all about being powerless in front of institutional dysfunction, which is an issue that I think all countries have in common. What’s your point of view on this? What did you learn from taking part in this project?
I think it’s sad because you realize you can’t really trust justice and that justice is unjust and the paradox is daunting because how do you get up from that as a country and as a society if you cannot trust the institutions? This leads to social courts, which means people judging without the justice system, and it becomes a witch hunt that’s just terrible.
So, what did I learn? To not blindly trust the institutions.
What were some of the challenges or discoveries you made while studying the script or even while on set?
This was my second time working with Fabrice Du Welz, so working together on a new character and leaving the old one behind was very interesting, the discovery process was really cool. Working with the cast was also amazing, learning from the nonprofessional actors who played my family was really exciting and they were so generous in bringing us into their lives.
“…working together on a new character and leaving the old one behind was very interesting…”
Generally speaking, what makes you say yes to a new project?
The script and the creative process: I love the idea of being part of it. So, it’s when I sense that the director has his own precise vision, and when I trust them, and when I feel like I have something to bring to the table.
Do you usually tend to be more instinctive or rational when preparing and playing a new character?
I don’t really like to work too much beforehand, doing too many rehearsals. So, I’d say I’m more instinctive, although I love to do my research and think about the character and her past life.
Growing up, was there an aspect of yourself difficult for you to accept? What was your experience about it?
I think, compared to when I grew up, in the 2000s, this new generation is way more open to topics like feminism and equal rights. When I was younger, I had an idea of what it meant to be a woman and struggled to match all the standards, so I’m happy that now I’m growing out of it and trying to find my way in the world as a woman. I’m trying to trust myself more.
“I’m trying to trust myself more“
When do you feel the safest? And when do you feel the most self-confident?
I feel safe and self-confident when I’m with the people I love. It can be at work with people I trust or admire, but mainly it’s with my friends and family and my sister.
Galatéa! We met her last year for an interview!
Yeah, I know you did! She is an actress, as well, and I feel so powerful when we’re together, and that’s a blessing.
An epic fail on the set?
I don’t remember any epic fail, but to be fair, I can say the whole vibe on set was very light, despite the tough topics.
For example, when we filmed the wedding scene, so many people came, so many extras, and I think some of them felt like it was a real wedding because we actually shot it like it was a real wedding, drinking, eating the cake together, so that was really funny and joyful. I got married for the first time! [laughs]
Now you know how it feels!
Playing different characters from time to time, you end up spending a lot of time with yourself, exploring your many sides, testing and getting to know yourself more and more. What’s the latest thing you’ve learned about yourself through your job?
Every day I learn how to do this job, I learn how to let go and stop trying to control everything because I can’t. It’s not easy because sometimes you work with people and you trust them, but then it’s not what you think it’s going to be, but I’m slowly learning to “lose control” and let the magic happen.
Your greatest act of courage.
Waking up in the morning and doing my job! [laughs]
Navigate through life and this industry as a woman, and be there for the people that I love.
“Let the magic happen”
What are you afraid of?
My biggest fear is to be abandoned by everyone. I’m also really scared of our world that’s burning: sometimes I feel like a little, useless animal, and sometimes I feel okay, it’s ups and downs, but I’m scared.
What does it mean to you to feel comfortable in your skin?
I think it’s when you can really forget about yourself and be completely into the things you do when you’re doing them.
What’s your happy place?
My happy place is wherever my sister is!
